One family share the long journey
Sadie was born via a surrogate and is just one of 115 babies born this way each year in Australia.
Cassie Chorn and Matt Birman’s daughter Sadie was born recently.
The enormity of the moment is hard to believe as my husband and I sit in the normalcy of a Friday night at home. We are doing normal parenting things, sterilising bottles, folding piles of laundry and stealing bites of chicken schnitzel while we soothe her to sleep.
But our journey to this moment has been anything but normal. That’s because Sadie was born via a surrogate and is just one of 115 babies born this way each year in Australia. And it was not just any surrogate who gave birth to her; it was her aunt, my husband’s sister, Natalie.
Three years ago (because that is how long our journey has taken us), surrogacy was not a concept we’d thought much about, beyond it being something that celebrities chose to do. As someone with chronic kidney disease, I had long thought that pregnancy would be challenging yet achievable.
But when my nephrologist and other specialists advised that pregnancy would be dangerous to both me and my unborn child, we felt that surrogacy was our only option if we wanted our child to be genetically ours.
We are both incredibly close with our sisters, and we have watched all three of them become mothers to beautiful children over the years.
When we shared news of our situation with them, each one offered, without any hesitation, to carry our baby for us. They knew the joy that parenthood could bring, and they selflessly wanted to give that to us. Ultimately, Matt’s sister, Natalie, carried and safely delivered our baby in May this year.
Rightly or wrongly, surrogacy laws in Australia are incredibly strict. Commercial surrogacy is illegal, in that the surrogate cannot profit from the arrangement. ‘Intended parents’, as we were known before our baby had arrived, are not allowed to advertise for a surrogate.
There are numerous legal, psychological and regulatory requirements to overcome before approval for a surrogacy arrangement is granted.
It took an enormous amount of courage, persistence, resources and determination to overcome the innumerable hurdles put in front of us by the state and federal governments.
We hope that by sharing our story, we can open up a conversation to effect change and help others in our situation build a family.
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